Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
Randomize
