what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
Talking to her is like watching "Bad Life Choices: The Movie"
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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