do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Randomize
