Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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