Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Randomize
