im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
