I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
