I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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