My room smells like vodka and shame
Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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