Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Randomize
