Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
