STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
