I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Randomize
