hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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