thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
