Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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