how can u be prego again
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize
