I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Randomize
