Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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