I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
You don't understand how difficult it is to give head with cotton mouth
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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