Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
two more shots til everyone in this club gets to see my cesarean scars.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
I touched a dick in church today
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
