i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
