You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
Sorry for all the texts. I got wasted and woke up at the foot of a staircase. From what I can gather, I fell down it.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
