Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
Randomize
