honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
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