Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
He told me I was his first American. I feel like I should've brought a flag to plant on him.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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