I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
