mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
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