3:47a: I take it you're not on your way over
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
