so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
All I want is dick and wine.
Randomize
