She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize