dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
