How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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