***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
When one is stoned and browsing online dating profiles all men sound like serial killers.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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