I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
That shit was hard as fuck. It felt like a mountain entering my vagina.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
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