I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I tried to tell him I love him but it came out something like "We're both fucked up and it works."
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
This German chick looked me up and down for a while. Then she grabbed my crotch, let go after a few seconds, and said "you vill do". I think I'm gonna like tonight.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
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