Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
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