How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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