I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Randomize
