he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
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