Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
