She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Randomize
