$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Just ushered a raccoon across the street so yeah.. Good night
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
