The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
