I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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