just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Oh god. I asked to "play his sexaphone" which I though was a super sex way to say "let me blow you". He fucking walked home at 4:30am
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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