He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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