We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
So you're mad that you saw a penis at a swinger's party? That's rational
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
