well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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