i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
I was walking around outside with a basket of eggs. I feel like little house on the prairie: hungover edition.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Randomize
